I was super excited for my parents to come and visit me in Colombia. My parents (my mother especially) love a holiday so it didn’t take too much to convince them to come and visit me on the other side of the world. My Mom tried to cover her fears when she realized that the only time they were available was when I’d be in Colombia and for several weeks before the holiday she had sleepless nights over taxi kidnappings and ride by shootings. Luckily, we faced no such obstacles.
My first thought after embracing them both in the clammy heat was the list of goodies I had asked them to bring across the waters with them…marmite!...baked beans!...clean socks!...YAAAAAY! It’s amazing the things you miss from home.

After spending a couple of days seeing the sights in Bogota (all by air conditioned private vehicle of course), they flew to the beautiful sea side port of Cartagena to meet me. Cartagena is definitely the most expensive city in Colombia and there are many western tourists strolling the streets and plaza’s but it is truly beautiful. Areas of the city are still to see development and the old Spanish walls have been beautifully maintained.
We spent our days sipping cerveza’s in shady squares and looking at the stunning fading architecture. My father busied himself in the ships and war museums while Mom and I shopped for souvenirs.

There are several excursions you can take around the city, and we booked all ours through the hostel I was staying in, The Chill House. Dad opted out of the trip to the mud volcano, an experience which wasn’t quite as relaxing as we’d have hoped, but an experience none the less. You drive up to the mud volcano, a massive lump of mud with a slippery climb to the top. Hop in with up to 30 other tourists and bake in the sun as a Colombian man rubs you down. The thick, sticky mud feels strangely calming, and the inability to stay afloat is somewhat unnerving, ending in giggling from all parties as you float off from your group unintentionally and struggle to ‘swim’ back. After negotiating the dangerous climb back down, the group heads to the river where you can pay someone to wash you down, or as we preferred, simply do it yourself. I was finding mud in my ears for the next 3 days so whether you pay someone or not, you’re not gunna get properly clean for a while!

The other trip we went on, which Dad joined, was a day trip to one of the stunning offshore island beaches. I can’t remember the name now, but I will endeavour to update this blog post with more accuracy soon. Most backpackers head off for an overnight stop here which I think is much advised. The tours take you to a few other stops throughout the day which are basically excuses for you to buy things, and leave you with a very short amount of time on the white sand beach which is the bit you want to relax and enjoy. Furthermore, once all the boat loads of tourists have packed off back to town and the beach vendors have given up trying to sell you things, an evening in your hammock or thatched hut would be very close to a slice of paradise.

I was a bit apprehensive to be spending 4 days in Vegas but I needed a tick to check The Grand Canyon off my bucket list. I went for a cheap day tour which pretty much involved hours of driving, an hour at the canyon and a shit load more driving. I wish I had more time to spend a night or two there as it was truly sensational, in fact I wish I had more time in the states period to see some of their stunning national parks, but I didn't, so whatevs! Splashing out on a helicopter ride would be totally worth it but the budget wouldn't handle it. Plus there's something kinda cool about driving through Nevada, stopping at gas stops in the middle of the desert next to the typical American motel.
I couldn't take enough photos of the canyon, nothing would do it justice and luckily me and my new friend off the coach were able to get away from the crowds and take in the beautiful view.

The rest of my time in Vegas stays in Vegas! I was couchsurfing with a 60 year old guy who grew his own weed and spent the day eating the buffet at his local casino and taking hits from the bong. How could I not get into the Vegas spirit?! I hung out round his pool feeling every inch fear and loathing! A night at the Cosmopolitan resulted in a free ticket to see a band on the roof top bar followed by a strip club and another evening resulted in a karaoke session where a woman hugged me for having the voice of an angel. Mix that with walking the strip with a pitcher of frozen cocktail while seeing a choreographed water fountain routine and a volcano spout fire. Vegas is super cool and being there with a group of mates would be awesome but i loved the randomness of my time there and the people I enjoyed it with. You always have friends in Vegas!

SURVIVAL TIP
Get cash out and leave your card at home, otherwise you'll wake up with more than a nasty hangover!

San Francisco is ace, it's cool, laid back, arty, cultured and clean, and proud to be all of the above and more. If you google 'San Francisco quotes' you'll find a ton of great things that people have to say about the city. I started with an amazing tour from Wild Wes that I went on with people from my hostel. Dapper Wes turned up with his ukulele ready to sing to through the highlights of the city. He took us to some cool places, like an underground tunnel used by pirate smugglers as well as all the cities best sights.

Fisherman's Wharf is another tourist attraction that you shouldn't miss, especially when the sun's out. Munch on clam chowder eaten out of a sour dough bowl, maybe even buy a sour dough crab or alligator! Check out the friendly sea lions and try and see the iconic San Francisco bridge through the fog. I also went to a cool vintage mechanical games hall, which was full of dancing puppets and fortune tellers.

'The Mission'

The Mission District was my favourite area of the city. I crashed on a friends couch who lived there so it was easy to walk around and check out the area. San Francisco is HUGE! And similarly to L.A it's a lot easier if you have a car although the public transport is much easier and cheaper to navigate. The Mission is the hipster area of town with heaps of galleries, coffee shops and graffiti. It's famous for its murals which line the main streets and back alleys. There's a strong Latino culture here, after the Spanish kicked the Yelamu Indians out in the late 1800s. I loved spending the day here, sipping my latte and taking photo's. There were some super cool boutique shops with stuffed animals and weird victoriana themed artefacts. Try not to talk to homeless people though. There's a huge homeless problem in San Francisco and once you've engaged some light conversation they won't leave you alone. Trust me! Trying to lose a scabby faced gang tattoo covered drunk down back alleys while he's begging you to hang out can get a bit hectic!

ALCATRAZ!

You typically have to book Alcatraz in advance so plan your time in the city around it. Boats run back to the mainland every few minutes so once you've got your ticket out you can stay as long as you like. I found Alcatraz amazing. Steeped in history and with a really creepy lost in time feel I loved it. The audio your is awesome, taking you all round the prison with voices of wardens and prisoners adding a real human aspect to the tour. You can stand in the cells and take in the atmosphere in your own time. I latched on to a walking tour where the guide told us about several crazy escape attempts which was awesome.

SURVIVAL TIP
There's loads to do and see in San Francisco but the best thing about the city is the laid back vibe. Grab a coffee, go for a stroll and let it all sink in.

I spent a month volunteering at Fundacion Arte del Mundo in the beautiful mountain town of Banos. There is tons to do in and around this region and although I spent most of my time sleeping in and making popcorn, in hindsight I did quite a lot while I was there. Here's a list of some of the fun stuff to do if you're ever in the area.

Banos is an adrenalin junkies dream with zip lining, an active volcano and numerous hikes on offer. Whilst I was there I went white water rafting, something to tick off the bucket list. It was AWESOME! We bundled into the minivan and headed off along the mountain roads. After donning our wetsuits and having a safety briefing we were in the water! 6 to a raft including our instructor we were soon dodging currents, bobbing gently in serene waters and throwing killer paddle high fives. Our only man went overboard in the final stages and with 4 panicky girls on the rescue mission I think he swallowed more freezing river water than he would have liked! But we survived! And by the end I was hooked, I wanted more rapids, more danger and more near death experiences (as long as they were experienced by someone else).
Two very brave boys I know also gave the bridge bungee jump a go...I was happy I just took the photos.

I know, I know, I'm a dickhead traveller. But I'm embracing it! Gap yah, yah? A traveller friend and I had discussed for some time about getting tattoos and when she came to visit me in Banos we bit the bullet. We were recommended to Kokopelli tattoo studio on bar street. I went for the colibri (hummingbird) nazca line after having a bit of a 'moment' when I saw them and having seen my first real life hummingbird in the yard of my volunteer quarters. Check out how badass I am! (So badass I almost cried and it only took 15 minutes).

You can't beat a bit of karaoke to cement new friendships. Karaoke is fairly new to South America and the ecuadorians love sitting in dark bars, confined to their booths singing depressing ballads. We went to karaoke twice and had two very different experiences. The first involved little showmanship from the other contestants and long waits for songs . Our second attempt was a much more successful evening, my recommendation is to find a small bar where there are no booths or tables. You pass the mic along the bar and have your moment in the sun. Although I previously slated the choice of 'depressing ballads' the English choices are pretty slim. My nights warbling wonders included Mariah Carey, Aerosmith, The Police and Toni Braxton. Ace!

For a relaxing morning, afternoon, evening, in fact any time at all! Get yourself to the thermal baths. A natural spring there are a number of pools of varying heats, some of them are bloody hot! Dip from pool to pool and shower off in the revitalizing waterfall! It's meant to be good for your circulation...or something? Whatever it feels great. Next to the baths are some sacred waters and a small shrine which is what brought people to the area all those years ago. Evenings are a great way to relax and unwind and look at the stars but they're busy, there's less chance of getting stuck in a small pool squashed between two red Ecuadorians if you go in the morning. Or maybe that's your thing?

There are tons of waterfalls shooting out of mountain caverns all around Banos, take a bus ride to a neighboring town and you'll see them. A Chiva bus (a brightly painted bus playing reggaeton with flashing disco lights - acceptable at night amongst Ecuadorian teens, a little bit weird for tourists in the middle of the day) can take you out to a number of the falls. We took a rickety cable car out over one, hovering above the devils mouth and then to the double fall which was spectacular. Wear your raincoat! You're gonna get sprayed!

RHINO BUS
I think this is for children? It's about a dollar, has bright lights and speeds round the towns tight bends. It's funny as hell, do it!

FOOD
There are some great places to eat in Banos. A hefty amount of backpackers has seen some lovely places open that have good western food as well as fantastic Ecuadorian classics. Here's my run down of a few of my faves.

• Stray Dog - Slow service but totally worth it. Run by a dedicated American the food here is to die for, great sandwiches and fries that really feel like home. The slow roasted pork is nom nom nom!
• Casa Hood - The staff here are super friendly and they do a brilliant $2 almuerzo. 3 courses of veggie goodness and a fruit shake, total bargain! It's also a nice place to hook up to the wifi and hang out, borrow a book or check out their movie screenings. Not to be confused with Cafe Hood, also a yummy option- get the purée potatoes!
• Cafe Sativa - This chilled out spot opposite Casa Hood has the best spiced coffee, darn it, the best coffee I've ever tasted. Simple dishes (the veggie burgers are ace and I'm not a veggie!) and the beautifully painted murals make it a lovely daytime hangout.

Puyo, a small lazy riverside jungle town and gateway to jungle excursions is a short bus ride from Banos. A few of the volunteers and I went for a weekend. My favorite part of the trip was a visit to Parque Omaere, which can be found in Lonely Planet. The American owner, married to a native Ecuadorian has set up an amazing botanical garden of medicinal plants and flowers as well as examples of indigenous dwellings. Tours in English are educational and fun and can be tailored to fit your time scale and interests. Highly recommended! They say they have the cure to cancer, go see what you think!

SURVIVAL TIP
It's easy to lose a lot of time anywhere when you're travelling (most get lost in the beach towns!) I was lucky enough to have to spend a month in Banos so do as much as you can with whatever time you have. If you can spend a significant chunk of your trip in any one place it's really worthwhile no matter where it is. (Drinking yourself crazy in a beach town probably isn't the best choice though!)

On my whistle stop tour of The States my first stop was L.A. Originally intending to hang around in the airport for a few hours on my way from Central America to Hong Kong, I changed my flights and had two weeks to see as much as I could.
The States is definitely set up for tourists and is mega expensive but I'm so glad I went. I couch surfed to keep my costs down and get the insider tips on what and where to go. Here's what I did with my three days in L.A, bear in mind I'm a slow person! If you have less time you could easily cram more in.

Day 1: Santa Monica and Venice Beach.
I was overlapping with a couple of couch surfers who had hired a car and were spending their last day on the beach so they kindly took me along. One thing to note, L.A is a bitch to get around! The public transport is pretty good (I got the bus back to Hollywood painlessly) but you have to factor this in to your timings.
Venice beach is a very bohemian hang out, full of beautiful people and a truck load if weirdos too it's an interesting place to spend a few hours. I walked from Santa Monica pier down to Venice and then got a bus back. Shopping, coffee shops, skaters and hippies, it's pretty cool. In my 6month old backpacker attire, I felt pretty out of place!
I never made it but The Getty Museum would be a good additional activity to add to this day as its pretty close (for L.A!)

Day 2: Celebrity Homes Hollywood Tour and Griffiths Observatory.
You can buy tickets for Celebrity Homes tours everywhere, haggle with them, they'll probably go as low as half price. I had an amazing time on this trip. Quintessentially American and touristy we drove past dozens of Hollywood homes and famous watering holes. Our driver had fun stories and tales to tell such as where he last saw Jennifer Aniston eating lunch and 'there's the palm tree Lindsay Lohan smashed into when she got her DUI.' Brilliant! The pictures below show the house 'The Osbournes' was filmed in and the balcony behind which MJ passed away!

Also on the tour we saw the Kardashian's shop Dash, along with other celebrity shops and stores, such as Kat Von Dee's tattoo shop, and I asked to be dropped at the walk of fame to compare my feet with Will Smiths. Along this strip is also where you'll find touts giving out free tickets for shows. I was looking for Jay Leno but instead bagged free tickets to see The Late Late Show for the next day where Keanu Reeves was a guest!

After a long day celeb spotting I met up with some more couchsurfing acquaintances and we went to the Griffiths Observatory. It's free to enter and you get fabulous views of the city at night. A great place to reflect and be thankful!

Day 3: Warner Brother's Studio Tour.
I umm'd and aah'd over Warner Brother's or Universal for my third day. By all accounts Universal is a big old theme park and a lot more expensive whereas Warner Brother's is more for the film fans, giving you back stage access to the film and TV sets you remember from childhood. On my tour I learnt how the same sets are used over and over and saw loads if stuff I remembered from TV and screen, such as the shop where Gizmo was bought in The Gremlins, the emergency fire escape where Spider-Man's 'upside down kiss' took place, and loads of stuff from 'Friends' like the park Phoebe runs in (my friends say I run exactly like her so this was exciting) and the alley way where Monica and Rachel argue over who should date Jean Claude Van Dam. We saw TV shows being filmed and I stood in Central Perk! There were also great tales and stories about glamorous past movie stars and their demands and little things kept me chuckling like seeing Ellen's parking space! For the boys there's a warehouse full of cars from Batman to Gran Torino.

Other things I did in L.A included walking up and down Hollywood Boulevard, eating lots of amazing food and eavesdropping to ridiculous conversations in the foots of the Hollywood hills. "I mean I know I'm nearly 30 but I could definitely play a 12 year old." A budding actress speaking to her soon to be agent.

Ecuador's claim to fame (and it's name) is its position on the equator. This famous spot is where Charles-Marie de La Condamine measured the equatorial line in 1736 that gave rise to the metric system. Pretty cool. There's a monument that you can have a photo taken with but the real draw is that the monument was actually put in the wrong place and if you walk a few meters down a dirt road you'll find the REAL Mitad del Mundo. A fantastic open air museum that shows the true equator. They tell you a bit of history of indigenous people and their beliefs based on astronomy and the position of the earth. Then it's time for the science! Balance an egg on a nail head and get a certificate, watch water turn different ways down the plug hole on either side of the line and all other quirky and fun treats to entertain and boggle your mind. It's super fun and another bucket list check off, I've stood on the equator people! And I have a stamp in my passport to prove it! Check that!

Cali, the town most backpackers will get to when crossing in from Ecuador gets its name from the Spanish 'caliente' meaning 'hot'. My travel buddy and I were mega excited for scorching heat and a little trip to the zoo. After a stressful border crossing at Ipiales, we wanted something to cheer us up. For anyone interested we'd arranged a full day of travel to get us to the border town before dark. Horror stories of robbings on these borders are rife, especially the Colombian guerrilla ones.. (Now I realise these are all ridiculous as Colombian people are some of the friendliest I've met). We arrived on time at about 5pm and as 6pm drew closer we were nearing the front of the que after about 5 pusher-inners had jumped ahead. "Heeeey, that's how they do it in South America", we mused. A que was forming at another window but we held our ground as the light faded.

There was one woman to go before us when the window closed and the guard fucked off. Brilliant. As she pushed her way to the front of the second que I grabbed Gemma's arm, smiled at the lady and said "We're with you!"
The lady in the second que stuck her arm out and blocked us so the three of us waited patiently.

The guard on duty had a particularly tight uniform bursting at the buttons and Gemma and I were giggling at his resemblance to a member of the YMCA when a gentleman piped up from behind "You think it's funny you can push in because you're westerners?"
Erm I don't think so Mister! In broken Spanish I argued that "Actually we've waited a really long time and loads of people pushed infront of us and were pushing with this non westerner so eeeeeerm no??!!" When Gemma added the brilliant line of "Noone wants to be out after dark!"

Everyone looked a little scared and confused, the guard grabbed our passports, stamped then quickly and told us to go. We ran across the border, were ushered into an unmarked car by a policeman and shit ourselves the whole way to our dirty hotel where we got takeaway pizza and watched horror films before our early morning bus to Cali. The zoo was necessary!

Cali zoo has tons of animals, lots of big scary ones like bears and lions and weird cute ones like meerkats and anteaters along with a ton of animals that I have no idea about. It was cool! They also had nice statues for photo ops, and this amazing 'make monkey facial expressions' mirror board. We spent a good half an hour pushing kids out of the way here.

We weren't sure if these turtle shells were for kids, but seen as they had small ones and then one that was less small we have it a go. Brilliant!

SURVIVAL TIP
Take a packed lunch to the zoo, the food's crap and overpriced.

Police Museum:

The Museo Historico Policia (not to be confused with the Military museum where you'll find tanks and other manly things) is a humorous museum that fills a nice afternoon. It houses a strange collection of police related odds and ends such as Pablo Escobar's gold encrusted Harley (and a roof tile with his blood on, although this was closed when I went), a range of military uniforms, weapons and a whole room on the drug situation in Colombia. Anyone trying to smuggle drugs can learn how NOT to and there was even a plaque to a canine hero who had sniffed out the largest drug raid ever recorded in Colombia. They gave him a medal!

Our guide was what made it though, he was absolutely hilarious, keeping watch as we tried on hats from around the world and posing with our pen for photos. He even took us up on the roof for views of the city and told us a story about the images on Colombian money. We got a free poster when we left too!

For a night out in Bogota head to Carne del Res outside of the city. Most hostels will put on a party bus of some sorts to take you there. It's expensive but the food is amazing! We got a steak and bottle of rum and then after everyone's finished eating you jump up on the table and dance away. It gets pretty crazy but the restaurant vibe will see you heading to an after party at around 2am.

Finally I have to show you some of the street art scattered around the city. The Old Town has some really beautiful buildings and street performers hang from trees in the small squares each evening. Grab a beer from the corner shop and go and hear a story being told or see a tightrope walker, this is what I loved about Bogota.

SURVIVAL TIP
Don't be scared! Your guidebook might deter you from the old quarter but it really is beautiful. There are police everywhere so you feel safe and if you keep your wits about you, like in any large city, you should be fine.

Cusco is a must on all travelers tour of South America. The jump off point for tours to Macchu Piccu and the Sacred Valley as well as a beautifully restored town and well known party city.

The Plaza de Armas is the meeting point of the city, surrounded on all sides by beautiful colonial architecture and boutique shops. A ticket to see all of Cusco's historic monuments can be quite pricey but just walking round the city you can tick the big ones off your list and pay separate entry fees for the few you may choose to see inside. The Cathedral of Santa Domingo is the big must see and the Church of the Jesuits in the main square is equally impressive.

All around the city you can see memories of the Incas. The huge stones used to build the old city walls still stand and in them you can find images of pumas and toads. Some are a little harder to see then others so tagging on to the back end of a your can help you pick them out.

Cusco's central market is a great place for a spot of lunch, a typical almuerzo will set you back a dollar or two and you can always be sure of a surprise treat you weren't expecting. And if you're not hungry, you'll soon work up an appetite with all the souvenir shopping.

The Inca Museum was a great spot with loads of artifacts on show from pots to gold and maps of cities and stars. It's a good place to get in the mood for Macchu Piccu.

To tell you about Cusco's nightlife might be telling a little too much, the best way is always to search out the hotspots for yourself. Most of the clubs are clustered up and around the square and many stay open into the early hours of the morning. My hostel recommendation for Cusco is Kokopelli, they have three other hostels in Peru and are a great place to start the party as well as a cool place to chill if you don't want a wild one.

Macchu Piccu was at the top of my bucket list and was the thing I was most excited to see in South America.
Most people do a 4 day Inca Trail (booked 6 months in advance) and others take a tour from Cusco a few days before, either a similar 3-4 day hike or for those who don't want the hard journey up the Inca train and then coach to the top.
I had booked a 2-day Inca hike along the original Inca Trail before leaving the UK (I don't find hiking particularly pleasurable) and was so pleased I did.
I woke up early on the day of my hike and was put on the Inca train where I went about a third of the way up and was hurled off on the side of the tracks. There I met my guide and we started up hill. The rest of my group had cancelled due to sickness so I got a private tour which was excellent. I practised my Spanish and learnt as much about the Inca's as I could.
The scenery along the way was spectacular, waterfalls, valley views and smaller Incan and pre-Incan settlements kept us entertained and were beautiful spots to take the necessary breaks. We chatted about how different we thought the world might be today if things had turned out differently for the Incas. Known for their warrior mentality the Incas had a great respect for 'Pacha Mama', the earth goddess. They only took from her what they needed and gave back when they did. They were also great thinkers, who built civilisations with complex water systems and mapped the stars. When they first met the Spanish they gave them gold as a welcoming gift, bad idea.

My favourite thing about the hike was walking through the Sun Gate and seeing the great Macchu Piccu nestled amongst the hills. We sat for about an hour looking at it, after regaining my breath which took some time!. My guide told me how no matter how many times he sees that view it is always like he is discovering it for the first time. It was magical.

After walking down to the town we had dinner and a good nights rest ready to see the site in all it's glory the next day. We got up early to see the sunrise, taking the bus up to the site (I got a stamp in my passport!) and then we waited for the sun to appear through the sun gate that we had walked through the day before. Their are too many amazing facts to share about Macchu Piccu, it truly is mind boggling. The stones within each temple fit together like a jigsaw, each block unique, and yet you cannot fit a blade between each rock. In one place, just to show their craftsmanship and skill the Incas built a curving wall between two natural stones with no purpose other than beauty and showmanship.

Complex stone hinges meant the city was secure, and a water system meant crops and inhabitants were hydrated. Scattered everywhere were signs of their belief systems, water fountains in the shape of frogs and an underground vault which opened up to the mouth of an eagle, believed to be where the dead were prepared for burial and then reborn.

Then I learnt about the Sacred Valley, a series of Incan settlements that lie around Cusco, and of which Macchu Piccu is a part of. The Incan king foresaw that the end of the world was near (which coincidently was foreseen to take place around the time the Spanish invaded, spooky). Believing that you travel to the afterlife via the Milky Way, the king began to build his own Milky Way on earth in order to control his destiny and pass through to the next life when his end came. Each town within the sacred valley lies directly below a constellation and from an aerial view the cities are built in the shape of each constellation. It literally is the Milky Way on earth. Pretty impressive huh?!